Cool-headed Carlos

If you haven't already seen it, Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano had quite the emotional breakdown the other day. In a game against the Pirates, Zambrano attempted to tag out a runner at home after a wild pitch. The umpire called the runner safe and Zambrano immediately began arguing. For those of you unfamiliar with Carlos Zambrano, he's well known in the league for being a good pitcher, but also for having a short fuse and blowing up easily. And blow up he did.

Here's the video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yX0lT0ADrTI

Uh, yeah. It got pretty heated and a lot happened in a short amount of time. Fortunately I happen to be an excellent lip reader and am able to relay to you what was said during the whole fiasco. Here's the exact transcript:

The runner just slides in under Zambrano's tag and is called safe by the umpire.

Zambrano: What?! Are you out of your mind, ump?! I put the tag down! He was out by a mile!

Ump: Cool it, Carlos. Choose your next words carefully.

Zambrano: Don't tell me too cool it! You made a terrible call, you freaking moron!!!

Zambrano pushes the ump away with his arm, a definite no-no. The ump throws him out of the game.

Zambrano: What?! What?! You're throwing me out?! No, no, no! I'm throwing YOU out!! YOU'RE out of here!!!! Yeah, that's right, ump! What do you think about THAT?!

Manager Lou Piniella comes out to get Zambrano.

Lou Piniella: Okay, Carlos. Come on. Let's go...

Lou and Zambrano start walking to the dugout. Carlos realizes he still has the ball in his hand.

Zambrano: Lou, how far do you think I can throw this baseball?

Lou Piniella: What?

Zambrano: I bet I can throw it into the left field bleachers from here.

Lou Piniella: Carlos, I don't think that's a good ide--

Zambrano chucks the ball into left field, well short of the stands.

Zambrano: Damnit!!!! Come on Lou, best two out of three??

Lou Piniella: Uh, I think you've had enough, dude. Let's just go into the clubhouse.

Zambrano throws his mitt into the dugout fence in frustration. He eventually makes his way into the dugout and spots the Gatorade dispenser.

Zambrano: Oh WTF is this?! Gatorade?! In a dispenser?! With different flavors?! It looks like a freaking soda machine at McDonalds!!! What is this?! There's too many choices!!! Where's the freaking classic Gatorade cooler?!?! I HATE new technology!!! It's like Terminator!!! Don't you remember what happened in the movie, you fools?!?! We all saw it after Friday's game!!! The machines are going to rise up!!!! They have to be destroyed before they become self-aware!!!!!

Zambrano grabs a bat and starts pounding away at the Gatorade dispenser.

Lou Piniella: Aw damnit, Carlos. I was going to drink some of that...

Okay, well, Zambrano didn't really say the thing about Terminator. I admit that it was just an excuse for me to put another picture of Arnold into the blog. But everything else was definitely right on.

(Remember, this man is the governor of California!)

By the way, I stumbled across this in the ESPN video library - the Top-10 all-time baseball meltdowns. There's some good ones in there.

Hasta la vista, baby.