Random Links for Your Friday

-- Steve Carell has stated that the next season of The Office -- Season 7 -- is going to be his last. And if it really is the end of the road for Michael Scott, my vote would be to end the show all together. The Office has had a great run, but let's be honest -- ever since the end of Season 3 and into Season 4, The Office has kind of lost some of its magic. And without Michael Scott? Come on. What's the point? Plus, let's not forget the worst part of no more Michael Scott: the end of that's what she said jokes.

-- This story about young people who work for the Obama Administration felt like some kind of screenplay that combined elements of The West Wing, Friends, and The Real World. Actually, it's kind of like a Washington version of The Hills. You have young, attractive people who lead privileged lives, except it's set in D.C. and it's politics, not fashion. Oh, and the people on the D.C. version actually earned their careers. I also like how The New York Times included an interactive map where the young Obama team members hang out so you can go and try and be hip with them.

--And here's San Francisco, right on cue. Now, I know what you're thinking: instead of worrying about what Arizona's doing, shouldn't San Francisco's higher ups be focused on trying to improve San Francisco? And you would be right... until you remembered that this is San Francisco, and this is exactly the kind of thing that San Francisco does. Then it all makes sense.

--Speaking of San Francisco, this video from 60 Minutes about the construction of the new Bay Bridge left me feeling pretty uneasy about living in the Bay Area. Like, REALLY uneasy. California love?

--Let's end on a more upbeat note, shall we? Get ready for Conan's first interview since leaving NBC. Suck on it, Leno.

--Okay, one more. Go Ags.

Over and Out

I received a call at work today and I had to take the guy's information. Now normally, when people need to spell names or email addresses out and there are letters that might be confusing, they'll say something like, "S as in Sam, M as in Mary..." things like that. So this is the exact conversation that took place between me and this caller:

Me: Okay, can I get your email address?

Guy: Yeah, sure. It's Charlie...

Me (thinking): Hmm, his name isn't Charlie... maybe it's some kind of nickname.

Guy: Bravo...

Me (thinking): Huh... that's an interesting email address...

Guy: Uniform....

Me (thinking): Okay, what the hell is this...

Guy: Romeo...

Me (thinking): ...... wow.....

In case you haven't figure it out by now, the guy was spelling his email out using MILITARY PHONETICS. If you don't know what that is, here's the Wikipedia entry under its official title, the ICAO spelling alphabet. You've seen it before, though, probably in war movies. You know, the soldiers get on their radios and say something like, "Bravo, Charlie, Delta," or whatever.

So for some reason, this guy decided that he couldn't just spell his name like a normal person and just say the actual letters. Mind you, as Wikipedia points out, "The paramount reason [for the ICAO spelling alphabet] is to ensure intelligibility of voice signals over radio links." Basically, it's to make sure that there are no mix-ups in radio conversations, especially during combat situations.

Okay, so let's calm down, G.I. Joe. You're calling me from your office building to my office building. This isn't Iraq and you're not exactly calling me in for a missile strike on an enemy target. In fact, when you started saying all the Bravo, Charlie, Uniform crap, it just confused me even more because I had to think wayyyy more about it to the point that I didn't even get your email address! But it's moments like these that make me that much more grateful that it's Friday.

Happy weekend, everyone.

The Return of Coco

You've probably heard by now, but Conan O'Brien has found his new home and in a pretty big surprise, it's TBS that landed Coco, not Fox like many had speculated. When I first heard this, I wasn't really sure what to think. Obviously it's cable TV, not network TV, and it's not like TBS exactly has an established late night TV history (i.e. George Lopez... and that's it). But the more and more I thought about it, it actually makes a lot of sense and it might actually be the ideal situation for Conan.

Here's why: if Conan were to go to Fox, it was going to create a whole situation involving local Fox affiliates and the network having to do some major shifting and redesigning of their schedule. It just looked really messy. But at TBS, they can basically do whatever they want. They gave him a great time slot (11pm), which starts 35 minutes before Leno and Letterman, and he has total creative control. Plus, it's cable so Conan can probably get away with a lot more jokes than if he were on network TV.

Additionally, Conan's show will have one of the best lead-ins possible: syndicated shows. Let's consider this hypothetical situation: let's say you're, I don't know, a 23 year-old male who stays up fairly late, pays attention to current events through the New York Times website (...and Facebook updates), but pretty much only watches shows on TV that will entertain him, which generally means something like Flavor of Love over Anderson Cooper 360. Do you think this hypothetical person is going to watch an hour of his local news before a late night talk show, or an hour of old episodes of The Office? Yeah, it's pretty close, but I think I... I mean, he... would choose The Office.

The point is that Conan is set up to do very well at TBS. He's going to be promoted on two channels (TNT and TBS). Plus, consider that TNT has the NBA playoffs and TBS has the MLB playoffs. Basically, you won't be able to escape the Conan hype machine.

Also, I think a lot of credit goes to George Lopez for making this happen. Conan initially didn't want to go to TBS because it would push George Lopez's show back, and that brought memories of a similar situation not too long ago... But Lopez called Conan up and told him he was all for it. is Lopez a good guy? Yeah, for sure. But he's also really smart. If you could have the most anticipated show in recent memory lead into yours, wouldn't you do it too?

It's also worth noting that Lopez's show right now is getting like over a million viewers a night. Wow. Who knew? After getting over that initial shock, it's also a pretty good indicator that Conan is going to be huge. No offense to George Lopez, but if his late night show can get a million-plus, you have to think that Conan's show is going to be off the charts.

So hats off to TBS for snagging one of the biggest names in the comedy industry. There's only one thing left for him to do: realize that all those Tyler Perry shows aren't funny in the slightest and they need to get rid of them immediately. Seriously. They suck. Trash them now. Please.

Random Movie Review: Heat

I randomly started watching Heat the other night and I forgot how awesome this movie is. I feel like it's sort of gotten lost in the shuffle, and I'm pretty sure I'd put it in my Top-1o all-time most underrated movies. For those of you who have never seen it, Heat was made in 1995 and the movie stars Robert De Niro and Al Pacino with De Niro as the leader of a group of robber, and Pacino playing the cop who's trying to catch them. If that's not reason enough to see this movie, I don't know what else is. Come on. It's De Niro and Pacino! Can you imagine them making a crap movie together??

(Okay, I know they did that movie Righteous Kill a couple years ago and it looked like total crap. But other than that, they haven't made a crap movie together! In case you're wondering, the two other movies they've been in together are The Godfather Part II and Heat. So let's all just give them a pass on the Righteous Kill fiasco.)

But Heat is just a great crime thriller from start to finish and the character development is superb. As much as you root for Pacino to catch the bad guy, you also feel for De Niro and his crew and you want to see them somehow win also. And it turns out that the detective and the robber have much more in common than they both think. Also, this movie has two great performances from Ashley Judd and Val Kilmer. In fact, I think it's Val Kilmer's second best movie role ever. His first best role was obviously Iceman in Top Gun. Obviously. Then it's his role in Heat. And then... well... uh... he did Batman that one time. And then, uh... he did uh..... well, he'll always be Iceman in my heart! Never leave your wingman!

We also can't forget about a young Natalie Portman in this movie who plays Pacino's stepdaughter. I think we need to recognize Natalie Portman as probably one of the greatest child actors ever. She was great in Heat, and she had probably the greatest child actor performance ever in The Professional. Anyway, there's tons of other recognizable names/faces in Heat: Jon Voight, Dennis Haysbert aka the president from 24 aka the deep-voiced guy from the Allstate commercials, Tom Sizemore, and Hank Azaria aka the guy who does Moe's voice from The Simpsons. Also! Jeremy Piven has a short on-screen role as a doctor. Now that Piven is an established comedy star, it's funny to go back and see him in movies where he had serious roles. This also works for actors like Vince Vaughn and, to a slightly lesser extent, Jack Black. (Read their filmographies. You'll see what I mean.)

Now, does the movie have its problems? Sure. The film is too long. Clocking in at about 2 hours and 50 minutes, Heat would probably have been just as effective with a run time of 20-30 minutes less than that. But what makes up for this shortcoming is the post-bank robbery shootout sequence; probably one of my favorite shootout scenes ever. It's loud, it's fast-paced, and lots of stuff gets shot up. And just as important, it looks like a real shootout. Now, I've never seen a real shootout in person, but I imagine it looks much more like something from Heat than from, let's say... Bad Boys. Don't get me wrong! Both good movies! Just good for very different reasons. Anyway, if you haven't already, go see Heat immediately. It's that good. I promise.

Welcome back, Tiger

Have you heard? Tiger Woods is back on the golf course! Yes, after months of non-stop Tiger coverage in the tabloids, we get to see him do what he's actually famous for: play golf. And, in case you missed it, Nike has released a new Tiger ad.

The voice speaking to Tiger is his late father, Earl Woods, and the reaction to the ad has been largely negative. Critics have used the words "manipulative" and "vile" and "crass." And perhaps it is all these things to a certain degree. Using his father, a man who passed away nearly four years ago, to speak to him in a sort of from-the-beyond kind of way, it seems as though Nike is trying to create an almost spiritual inspiration of sorts. Does that belong here? Very debatable.

But here's what I think: it's actually a pretty well-done commercial. First off, it's simple. No gimmicks or special effects. It's just a 30-second black and white, single shot of Tiger. Second, Tiger doesn't say anything. He listens. I think that at this point, it's important for him to not be making any big speeches or offering more platitudes because he's tried that a couple times now and people just aren't taking him seriously. Third, it talks about the scandal. Granted, it does it indirectly, but it's clear that the purpose of the commercial is to address it and not try and act like it never happened.

Finally, what I think is most striking about this commercial is that it shows that Nike is committed to Tiger. The swoosh had been saying for a long time that they were standing by their man, but this was their first opportunity to show it. And in the commercial, Nike acknowledges that Tiger messed up. But at the same time, the last question of whether he learned anything (and by asking, it's implied that he did learn) I think it shows that everyone is ready to move on.

On that note, in the end, the best thing that Tiger can do to move past all the tabloid talk is to get out there and win. If there's one thing that we've learned from American athletes who get into trouble, it's that winning solves everything. Remember the Kobe Bryant rape trial? Yeah, neither does Kobe. Or the rest of America for that matter. Remember Ray Lewis? People forget that this was a man who was charged with murder! MURDER! You want to know the backlash of that? He was on a Super Bowl-winning team next year and then was put on the cover of a Madden video game a few years later. What a country.


Anyway, Tiger's doing his part with a -6 through the first two rounds. Soon enough, this will all be but a distant memory, and we can get back to fun Nike-Tiger ads.

And then there were four...

The Final Four is finally upon us, and the collective population can be divided into two groups. The first group consists of people who still have some vested interest in the tournament (i.e. their bracket) and are rooting like crazy for a random team they have no business cheering for otherwise. The second group consists of people who could really care less who wins (i.e. their brackets are busted) but if they have a soul, they'll be rooting for Butler.

As for me, I've already won one bracket wager but have one remaining that is very much relying on the outcome of this weekend. So this puts me somewhere in the middle of these two groups. On the one hand, I need specific teams to win and lose in order for me to win the bracket pool, but on the other hand, I really, really want to see Butler win the whole thing. (By the way, I'm not going to tell you exactly what I need to have happen because I'm pretty afraid of jinxing myself. I know, it sounds lame and it's stupid, but screw you -- I'm not going to do it. You'll see an example of why later.)

But let's forget about the Final Four for now. There will be plenty of time later to struggle with my moral dilemma of which team to cheer for. Looking back at this year's tournament, I think everyone can say confidently that this is exactly why March Madness is the most entertaining sporting event ever. Closely contested games? Check. A good number of upsets? Check. Small schools suddenly rising to national prominence? Check. CBS still struggling to effectively cover all the games going on at once? Check.

Here's a quick recap of the tournament to this point...

Most entertaining game: Syracuse-Butler
Lots to choose from, but I give the nod here largely because of the text message exchange I had with my brother during this game (slightly edited for content).

(After Syracuse is down 13-3 early in the first half)
My brother: Syracuse is effing up really badly.

Me: Yeah, they need to relax. Get it together.

My brother: Butler isn't even playing that well. Syracuse just needs to take care of the ball a little bit.

Me: Yeah, I think they'll calm it down and stop turning it over so much.

My brother: Yeah. If they can end the half down by 7, they'll pull through.
(Syracuse goes into halftime down 10)

My brother: Also, Butler's coach looks like he's 25.
(This was funny because I had just said the exact same thing to someone else maybe an hour earlier.)


Syracuse starts the second half on fire and comes back to take a one-point lead with about 13 minutes left.

My brother: Game over.
(Oh no... Please, no...)

Me: Don't jinx it!

With 5:24 left and Syracuse up four, they then decide to not score again until there's 35 SECONDS LEFT IN THE GAME. It's the jinx!!!!

My brother: Wow. Wow. Syracuse is terrible.

(The game is just about over now. Syracuse ends the game with a terrible possession that a high school JV team could have run better.)

Me: Wow what the hell was that...

My brother: I don't know. That fatass Jackson has bricks for hands.

Anyway, you get the picture. It was a wildly entertaining game, mixed with some high emotions and an ultimate jinx from my brother. See? You don't mess around with a jinx, man!

Biggest upset - Northern Iowa over Kansas
There really isn't any other choice here. Top overall seed knocked off by a strong collection of ULWGs (Unathletic-Looking White Guys)? A ridiculously clutch three that went against all basketball logic to seal the game? No brainer. It was like a reverse version of that movie Glory Road, which told the story of the first all-black starting lineup in NCAA history and their eventual national championship. In fact, when a team of all ULWGs wins a national title, Hollywood needs to jump on that bandwagon immediately.

Biggest upset followed by biggest reality check: St. Mary's
The Gaels shocked Villanova, Omar Samhan became an overnight celebrity, and the city of Moraga was rocking until 10pm! But then came Baylor who provided a swift and thorough beatdown. This was the headline in the New York Times recap: "Baylor Celebrates Win, then Plays Another Half."

Speaking of St. Mary's...

Guy you most want on your team, but you really hate if he's not on your team: Omar Samhan.
Is the guy good? Absolutely. Is he a douche? Absolutely. He has that swagger that makes him a guy you'd love to play with, but you'd probably want to punch him in the face otherwise.

Random player who I want to see succeed at the next level: Scottie Reynolds
I recently read an article on Scottie Reynolds in Sports Illustrated and it just showed he's a really good kid who works hard, has a level-head, and strong morals. (When he was in high school, he once left a championship game in the fourth quarter because that night was his Bible study night.) And let's not forget, the dude can play some basketball. He also has one of those names that you have to say both first and last names or else it doesn't sound as cool. Just say it. Scottie Reynolds. It's pretty nice, right?

Anyway, let's just end with Final Four predictions. Honestly, any of these teams could win the tournament. Forget the number seed they are. None of that matters anymore. Now, I know that Duke has been prone to coming up short in recent years, but Kyle Singler, Jon Scheyer, and Nolan Smith are a solid tandem. Yes, the Blue Devils have had a bit of an easier road, but I'm going to go ahead and pick the Dukies.

But remember, if you're not rooting for Butler, you have no soul.

Definitely Not the End of Speidi

Bad news, everyone: Heidi Montag has decided to let her psychic/manager go. While I really would have liked to have seen where this psychic/manager was going to lead Heidi in her career, I guess we should probably just applaud Heidi for coming to her senses and realizing that hiring a psychic for ANYTHING is beyond stupid. Even for Heidi.

But I do have GOOD NEWS regarding our favorite couple. (By the way, I feel the need to preface the news with the reminder that it is absolutely true. I'm not making this up. And it's probably never a good thing when someone's telling a story about you and they have to give that disclaimer beforehand.) Anyway, perhaps still in search of that spiritual connection, Spencer and Heidi have decided to give themselves Native American names. Spencer will be known as Running Bear and Heidi will be known as White Wolf. Remember, I'm not making this up.

This is what Spencer, er, Running Bear said about the name change, ""[We] are getting more in-tune with our spirituality ... and will be known as the name our creator has given us—our true native-AMERICAN names."

Again, this is not made up!!

By now you have many questions, I'm sure. Are they Native American in any way, shape, or form? Did they consult any Native American tribes about doing this? Could they have possibly chosen more stereotypical Native American names? The answers: no, no, and probably no. Normally I'd give some kind of humorous analysis but in this case, I think that the story itself is more than enough. And these are the kinds of things I like: when the work has already been done for me.

But remember in my last posting about Speidi, I wrote that everyone needs to hope that they manage to stay together for a long time for the sake of the world's collective entertainment? This, my friends, is exactly why.