Get Mad Redux

If you read my previous post, I made two predictions for this year's NCAA tournament. Let's revisit them.

1. Kansas is head and shoulders above everyone else and will win the whole thing.

Yeah, okay, this turned out to be horribly wrong. But you know what? I know you got it wrong too, so let's just move on...

2. Only a couple high-seeded teams would make it out of the first weekend.

This turned out to be pretty wrong too. Washington? Where the hell was this during the Pac-10 season? Cornell? They EASILY swatted their first two opponents (but we'll see how they fare against Kentucky). St. Mary's? I seriously think that they have a legit chance to beat Baylor and get to the round of eight. Omar Sanham is a bit of a douche, but the guy can play some ball.

But perhaps the most shocking of these is Northern Iowa. Did you see this team? I'm not sure I've ever seen a better collection of unathletic looking white guys in my entire life. And it's not like they had some miracle comeback or kept going back and forth with Kansas. They led nearly the entire game! Ridiculous.


Anyway, now that the Jayhawks are out, I need a new team to jinx-- I mean, pick for the championship. Kentucky, you're up.

On a completely unrelated note... is it bad that I want to see this?


Who's coming with me....

Get Mad

It's here. The most entertaining sports event of the year. The NCAA tournament. There's no other game, playoff, or championship that even matches the three weekends of March Madness. The biggest reason why? Those freaking brackets you fill out and labor over every year. Teams that you would have never heard of otherwise (Murray State? Siena?) are suddenly relevant. And because you want so badly to maintain your bracket's integrity, you find yourself getting wayyy too into these games.

One thing I hear people say is that sometimes when they watch close games between an underdog and a power, they start rooting for the dog even if it means that their bracket will collapse. Okay, that's the biggest load of BS ever. You want to have the best bracket of all your friends. You want to be able to wave it in their faces. You want to be able to show off just how much you "know" about college basketball. For example, remember George Mason's magical run a few years ago? Sure, I was amazed just like everyone else. But damn, I was rooting so hard against them in some of those later rounds because I was dangerously close to having zero teams in the Final Four (which, unfortunately, ended up happening). Anyway, the point is that first and foremost, you want to have the best bracket. There's always time later to reminisce about those magical runs.

One more thing. I know a lot of people have money at stake for a lot of their pools or some other kind of wager. But I play for pride. Does that sound noble? Sure. Does it sound kind of douchey? Yeah, probably. But it's the truth. I like to think I know a fair amount about sports and the tournament presents an opportunity to show that off. At the same time, however, the tournament is also a prime opportunity to be humbled as it can reveal just how little you actually know...

Here's my one piece of advice to you when you fill out your brackets: just be correct at the end. Let me explain. You can go crazy early, pick some random upsets in the first few rounds, but your bracket needs to look pretty good from the Elite Eight on because that's where you score the big points. Example: last year I picked the opening two rounds pretty accurately, something like 43 of the first 48 games. Feeling pretty good, right? But my bracket fell apart late, I only picked one Final Four team, and I didn't pick the national champion. I ended up finishing fourth or so. So just remember: get it right at the end.

With that, let's look at this year's tourney. Kansas is the consensus favorite, and with good reason. They've got size, speed, good coaching, and experience. They also have one of the keys to a good college basketball team: a white guy who dominates now, but will probably be warming the bench in the NBA (Cole Aldrich). Bonus points for having a white guy on the team with a cool name (Brady Morningstar). However, they've been put in the toughest bracket, which makes zero sense since they're supposedly the top seed overall. If they get past Michigan State in the Sweet 16, I like them to get to the Final Four and win the tournament.

The one-seed with the easiest bracket? Duke. Of course it is Duke, so they'll probably find someway to choke. Kentucky looks pretty good too with John Wall and DeMarcus Cousins. They are freshmen, though, so who knows how they'll hang when crunch time comes. Also, John Wall might be distracted by the prospect of being drafted by the Nets and trying to figure some way out of it.

As for Cinderellas... I just don't see any high-number seed getting very far. I'm sure there will be a couple who get out of the first weekend, but that's probably about it. Look for the big boys to be there at the end.

But the best thing about this year's tournament? Games streamed live online. Can you say ultimate work distraction? Yes, yes I can.

Here's my Final Four.

Kansas, Kansas State, West Virginia, Duke - with Kansas your national champion.

Rock chalk, Jayhawk.

The End of Speidi?

I think everyone pretty much saw problems between Spencer and Heidi coming at some point. But in true Spencer and Heidi fashion, it had to be done in some absurd and comical way: reports are that the two might be having some marital issues after Heidi replaced Spencer as her manager with - and this is true - a psychic.

Let's try and be fair to both sides. First to Spencer. I can't believe I'm about to say this, but let's give the guy a little credit. He probably did all he possibly could to try and promote Heidi in her acting/singing/whatever-else-she-thinks-she's-good-at-but-in-reality-
has-zero-talent-in-it career. But when your debut album can't even sell 700 albums in its opening week, I think the problem goes much further than the manager. You have to think that deep down, Spencer knew that Heidi's singing career was on the fast track to nowhere and yet he loyally stuck by her. For that, I have some sympathy for him. But he's still a huge douche.

As for Heidi, let's just try and understand what she's going through: no one in the world likes her; she can't sing; her self-esteem is so low that she had plastic surgery done to nearly all of her body parts; oh, and her husband is a douche. So it only makes sense that she would turn to the one person who truly understands her: her psychic.

But let's not laugh at her! Why wouldn't you want someone on your team who can see your future by asking you leading questions while never really giving you concrete answers and takes your money at the same time? As Heidi wisely points out, "Having an intuitive psychic leading my team gives me an edge no one else has."

If only we could all be as clever as her. Here's to hoping that Speidi can work through their problems and continue to keep all of us entertained for many years to come.

Your March Madness Warm-up

The NCAA tournament is a week away and the NCAA has come up with probably one of the greatest things ever to get you in March Madness mode. Check out vault.ncaa.com. You can replay any game from the sweet sixteen round and upward IN ITS ENTIRETY from the last 10 years of tournaments. Probably the greatest time suck possible. I almost didn't want to leave work last week because I was re-watching the Kansas-Memphis final from 2008....almost.

Anyway, this will definitely get you in the mood for this year's tourney. My personal recommendation: the UCLA-Gonzaga game from 2006. It doesn't get much better than watching Adam Morrison cry on the court before the game was even over. Well done, NCAA. Now if only they could do something about that damn BCS...

USA! USA! USA!

This is from The New York Times recapping last night's Rangers-Penguins game. Am I the only person who thinks the USA chants thing is hilarious?

The post-Vancouver warm fuzzies were banished 4 minutes 10 seconds into the Rangers’ first home game since the Winter Olympics, after Lundqvist came out of his crease to yell at Sidney Crosby. He was scolding Crosby for embellishing a fall after Rangers defenseman Marc Staal cross-checked Crosby in the ribs.

“I just thought it was a bad call, and I thought that he played it,” Lundqvist said, referring to Crosby, who scored the gold-medal-winning overtime goal for Canada against the United States on Sunday. “I told the ref he’s a great player and should be protected, but he shouldn’t use it either.”

Crosby shoved Lundqvist away, which prompted Brandon Dubinsky to skate over and start pummeling Crosby while the Garden crowd chanted “U.S.A.! U.S.A.!” along with something more vulgar involving Crosby’s name.

USA chants to taunt Sidney Crosby. I love it. You also have to admire the way The New York Times always manages to write so professionally: "...along with something more vulgar involving Crosby's name." Great stuff.

And if it's Friday, that can only mean it's time for another Daily Show clip. It's 10 minutes long, but it only gets better as it goes on. Wait for the loan shark. Trust me.

And here it is, your moment of zen.